Do you ever see those 14 hour lipstick commercials? You know, beautiful young women in their twenties doing something professional like rolling out blue prints, dressed in a curve hugging dress, eating pot stickers with chopsticks right out of the take-out box for lunch. I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, Karen, that’s no commercial- that was yesterday. Well, not for me. The other day, I went out for coffee wearing a novelty men’s t-shirt. Today, I am wearing another men’s novelty t-shirt and tomorrow, you guessed it- another men’s novelty t-shirt. See the pattern? Oh, I still wear my lipstick. Just no curve fitting dress. Tomorrow, lunch will be a protein bar or PB&J. When did this happen? When did I become this men’s t-shirt, make-up-yoga-pants-wearing Hobbit? I sat on my couch tonight watching a 14 hour lipstick commercial during The Big Bang Theory wondering, “Did I even HAVE a lipstick moment?”
I guess that was supposed to happen during my twenties. Of course, I look back and I remember my twenties full of doctor’s appointments and tests. Sometimes, I feel like scleroderma robbed me of my “Lipstick Moment”. But wait, I did something else in my twenties. There was a time before scleroderma and it did involve wearing all white to work sometimes. When I was 22, I was in the Navy (yes this video does make me feel a little badass, I would have chosen better music). I kind of had my “14 hour lipstick” moment. I probably had more than one, but the one I remember most vividly happened not in a big building with blue prints in a tight fitting dress. It happened on board a ship, somewhere in the Indian Ocean. I wasn’t wearing white at the time, I was wearing my working blues. Back then it was bell bottoms and a light blue shirt, often referred to as prison couture.
The galley just got the soft serve ice cream machine working, or maybe it always worked and I never noticed it. It does’t matter. My friend Samantha and I were sitting at a table enjoying our ice cream cones. Now, keep in mind we were out to sea on a ship and that’s a very lonely place, so please don’t judge the subjects I talk about. Sometimes we all have a moment where we can’t stop looking. Anyway, Sam and I were enjoying our ice cream cones at a table in the ship’s galley. It was very hot and our cones were melting fast. I had almost finished the top of my cone, when I looked up from our conversation. Every male in my line of site was staring at us. Apparently, eating an ice cream cone is interesting to men. I made a motion to Sam, slapped her on the shoulder and pointed to the nearest male. We both looked at him. He looked frightened and turned bright red. Sam and I looked at each other and laughed. The galley became noisy again. We finished our cones and headed back to work.
My life today is far from a supper-model-14-hour-lipstick moment. Or is it? I did get hit on while wearing my mens novelty t-shirt to coffee the other day. Maybe it was the lipstick or my snappy wit. Maybe I’m just as hot as I was at twenty two. Maybe at 41 my wisdom
and intelligence adds to my hotness. And maybe ducks will fly out of my belly button. Who cares? I still got hit on while wearing a men’s novelty t-shirt and yoga pants and what I think look like goofy hands. I’ve still got it. We all do. Sometimes we just need to be reminded, more importantly, we need to remind ourselves. I rarely feel like the hot chic, but my inner hot chick is there and it shows itself. Your hot chick or hot guy is still in there. Don’t neglect him/her and let him/her out every now and then. And remember, sometimes our hot chick/dude is showing whether we know it or not. Now dance.